Friday, December 29, 2006

Berating Bonaduce

Is there anything more pathetic on TV right now than Danny Bonaduce’s current VH-1
"Celebreality" show?  I used to really like this guy, but he's become totally insufferable the last year or so via that vaunted series "Breaking Bonaduce" whilst exposing all his "demons" and "problems" to the moronic viewing public who find this tripe to be "like, omigod, it's so intense!". 

I put "demons" and "problems" in quotation marks because I firmly believe this whole sham is all just an act by Bonaduce, as are ALL reality shows—Ozzy Osbourne was reading off fucking cue cards (poorly) on "The Osbournes", remember?  Now ol' Dante preys on everyone’s sympathies trying to cast himself as some sort of martyr, but all I see here is a sorry-ass has-been who's so desperate for attention (and a paycheck) that he'll put on this phony self-absorbed pity party for people's entertainment, and it’s complete and total hooey!

I stumbled across Dangerous Dan and his idiot wife Gretchen (what a total waste of pretty red hair, by the way) on Dr. Phil’s show a couple weeks back having yet another pity party for the cameras, and I couldn’t believe how Doc Phil (yet another guy I used to really admire whose stock has slipped big-time with me) was actually condoning this whole sham!  I may be going out on a limb here, but it seems to me that Dr. Phil or ANY therapist worth a damn would NOT allow their client(s) to go through therapy on NATIONAL TELEVISION—something they call doctor-patient confidentiality, I believe.  Oh, did Doc Phil bother to utter his catchphrase "what the hell were you thinkin'?" regarding the fact that Dante and Gretch got married on the day they met?  Call me crazy, but ain't that a pretty blatant red flag right there, Kimosabe Phil?

Yes, it's well-documented that Bonaduce had a mega-dysfunctional home life as a kid—his old man was (and I'm being kind here) a human turd—and no doubt he's had a checkered career at best since the P-Family, so his behavior is somewhat understandable.  BUT, that doesn't justify this travesty of a TV show!  And give me a bleepin' break about that suicide attempt crap for the cameras—oh, puh-leeze!  Call me cynical if you want, but Danny ain’t about to bump himself off as long as he’s drawing that paycheck from VH-1, et al.  
And to think I once considered David "I'll-claim-I-doinked-Susan Dey-just-to-sell-my-autobiography" Cassidy to be the big douche-bag on "The Partridge Family"!  A big error in judgment on my part, apparently...