Thursday, April 5, 2012

Travelblog: 2012 Worldwide Texas Tour, Episode 3

"LOOK AT ME, I CAN BE CENTERFIELD..."
This would be the somewhat pointless centerfield slope at Astros Field in Houston (formerly known as Enron Field and currently known as Minute Maid Park, but I prefer to call it 'Astros Field').  The flagpole-in- play shtick is reminiscent of Tiger Stadium in Detroit, yet very few fair balls ever enter this area of the park, which I had the pleasure of touring last week.  Our tour guide was a spunky lady named Della, and she was was quite knowledgeable and passionate about the current Astros playground, which ironically I passed by on foot the very day it opened in 2000, but there were no tickets to be had that day.  The $9 tour took us up to the press box, and down to the Astros dugout, as well as the visitors bullpen in left center field (which is outfitted with actual Astrodome AstroTurf) and through the innerds of the hand-operated out-of-town scoreboard in left field.  I've never been INSIDE a scoreboard in my life before, so this was quite an honor.  This whole tour was a last-minute addition to my itinerary, and a very pleasant surprise, indeed.  Someday, I'll actually do a game there, especially since the Astros will be joining the American League next season...

HOUSTON, WE DO HAVE A PROBLEM...
Before doing my tour of Reliant Stadium, I couldn't help but notice how the "Eighth Wonder Of The World" next door ain't looking so wonder-ful anymore.  In fact, The Astrodome looks downright pathetic, with rust and fungus and who knows what growing on its exterior.  If this thing was an animal, it'd be euthanized by now.  The city of Houston honestly doesn't know what to the do with the place since the advent of the new stadium a decade ago--the preservationists want to save it, but no one's come up with a new practical (let alone feasible) use for the place.  In fact, a mere three days after my visit to "Reliant Park", a Houston TV station took an inside look at the decaying edifice and the results were semi-horrifying.  The Houston Chronicle also did a recent photo essay on-line that re-confirms the same sad state of affairs.  Come on, Houston, tear The Astrodome down already if you can't redevelop it--this is like looking at a sick relative dying...

THE MOST-RECENT ROUND-UP
Apparently the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo is a pretty big deal, so much so that it ties up Reliant Stadium for like, two months after the Texans' football season ends.  The Reliant Stadium tour was one I was really looking forward to heading into this road trip, and it wound up being rather disappointing, overall.  First off, I was hoping to see the actual football field, but it was buried under mounds of dirt, but technically, I did set foot upon a field that the Super Bowl was contested on for the first time--technically, that is, and it wouldn't be the last one on this trip.  The other downer was the elderly lady who was our tour guide--I actually had to point out where the TV press box was located for her.  Something ain't quite right when I know more about the place than the tour guide does, but somewhere in the center of this photograph is where the world's most (in)famous wardrobe malfunction took place...

"RUMORS SPREADIN' 'ROUND, 'BOUT THAT TEXAS TOWN..."
Okay, so where were all them "nice girls" that Z.Z. Top sang about?  I didn't even see a damn shack in this place!  Truth be known, La Grange is a much bigger town than I was expecting--almost 5,000 folks, and of course, the famed "Chicken Ranch" closed down in 1973, long about the same time the song "La Grange" hit the charts.  Haw-haw-haw-haw, indeed...

"WHEN THE SUN COMES UP ON A SLEEPY LITTLE TOWN..."
...down around San Antone."  The sun did indeed come up over said sleepy little town that morning, but no one saw it because it was overcast all day.  I didn't see any preachers, teachers or Samurai swords, either.  Pretty uninspiring place, really--how Tom Johnston of the Doobies milked a timeless classic song out of it, I haven't got a clue...

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Travelblog: 2012 Worldwide Texas Tour, Episode 2

Houston, we have no problem...

EVERYTHING'S BIGGER IN TEXAS...
This was my lunch on Monday at a place called Langford's Groceries, just off downtown Houston, which was profiled on Food Network's "Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives".  It's not actually a grocery store, but an eatery housed in what used to be a gas station garage once upon a time.  I placed the Diet Coke can there to give this thing some scale--that's 1.5 pounds of freakin' beef!  I ate every last ounce of it in one sitting, too, and it was outstanding.  This thing makes a Hardee's "Monster Burger" look positively bite-size in comparison.  Guy Fieri got this one right...

SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE...
I was tickled to death to see that this Texas institution still exists, the mighty Spec's Liquors.  It was here at their location near downtown Houston that I legally purchased alky-hol for the first time back in 1984.  I was only 19 at the time, but this was back before Texas raised the legal drinking age to 21.  Even their signage hasn't changed in 28 years...


"WE'LL KICK TO THE CLOCK"
In the 1962 American Football League Championship Game, Dallas Texans' RB Abner Haynes uttered this rather infamous gaffe during the coin flip before overtime (he should've told the ref that the Texans wanted the ball) at the 50-yard line of this venue, Jeppesen (now Robertson) Stadium at the University of Houston and orginal home of the Houston Oilers.  That's not the clock the Texans kicked to, of course, but it is the direction that Haynes chose to kick it.  Turned out his FUBAR didn't matter anyway, as the Texans won that day, in their final game before becoming the Kansas City Chiefs. 

TICKLE ME, ELMO...
Apart from Otis Taylor and Jan Stenerud, Elmo Wright was my favorite Chiefs player from back in their glory days, thanks mostly to his silly TD celebration dance he'd do in the end zone (at the 4:45 mark of this video).  Elmo is also honored in the end zone of Jeppesen/Robertson Stadium as one of the standout "Coogs" of the U. of Houston.  The stadium, which has also served in recent years as the home of Major League Soccer's Houston Dynamo, will be demolished after the 2012 football season and replaced by a brand new stadium.

Travelblog: 2012 Worldwide Texas Tour, Episode 1

I hit the highway last week and spent seven days in the land of Tejas.  Good trip, overall, but I could've done without the warm and sticky weather (which arrived a month earlier than it should have), as well as the more-than-abundant number of dead bugs coating my windshield and front bumper.  As per my usual, here be a pictorial chronicle of my travels...

A LONG WAY TO GO, YET...
Instead of taking the conventional route to Texas via I-35 through Oklahoma City, I decided to take U.S. 71 down through Missouri and Arkansas.  My first stop was Joplin, MO, where I got my firsthand look at the devastation from last year's tragic tornado there.  The rebuilding process has been gradual, but very slow, given the massive scope of the damage inflicted on this town, including Mercy Medical Center, which suffered a direct hit during the storm.  It remains largely unchanged in almost a year (the storm struck on May 22, last year) as the staff continues to operate out of temporary facilities and mobile CT and MR units.  However, it's about the only structure that even remained upright within about a two-mile radius.  I wish these folks well in their on-going recovery efforts...

 
WHERE THE EVIL EMPIRE BEGAN
This would be Sam Walton's first retail store in downtown Bentonville, AR.  It now houses a Walmart museum (which, surprisingly, they don't charge any money to enter), and the company's rather unimpressive corporate headquarters is located about a mile away.  Rather ironic that the original store is festooned in Target's colors.  [NOTE: I've been dying to use the word 'festooned' for a while now...

PIG SCREEN TV
This is the video board at Razorbacks Stadium at the University of Arkansas in Fayetteville.  I'm not real crazy about MU moving to the SEC, but Missouri fans do have a nice new road trip option when the Tigers play down yonder--probably about a three-and-a-half hour drive from Columbia.  I've been lobbying for years for Arkansas to join the Big 12, but ain't no way that's going to happen...

"THEY'RE THIRSTY IN ATLANTA, AND THERE'S BEER IN TEXARKANA..."
Just like Kansas CIty, Texarkana has a State Line Road dividing it.  That's Arkansas on the left and Texas on the right, and the courthouse smack dab in the middle in this photo. [Note the bug crap already accumulating on my windshield, after just six hours on the road]  Fortunately, I didn't encounter Sheriff Buford T. Justice lurking around town whilst I passed thru...