OH, IS THERE A FOOTBALL GAME ON TONIGHT?
Much has been made about the NFL's decision to simulcast tonight's Patriots-Giants game on CBS and NBC, in addition to their own NFL Network, which is originating the broadcast. The league claims it's so the fans can witness potential history with the Pats trying to go undefeated and all, but what they won't admit is their little cable channel is a colossal flop. Yours truly is as big an NFL fan as they come, but I have no desire to pay extra for NFL Network, and I think most other football fans feel the same way, but true-to-form, the league is using their little simulcast as a three-hour infomercial for their cable channel.
During the first year of its existence, I got NFL Network as part of my existing digital cable package and I was largely unimpressed with it. Their typical programming day was a total bore—it was the same three-hour block of shows run continuously. One show dissected every aspect of the game ad nauseam (á la ESPN), and there was another show following the Jacksonville Jaguars through training camp (zzzzz!), blah blah blah. I also fully expected the league to take advantage of their virtual treasure trove of old school NFL Films highlights from the past 40 years to fill out at least part of their daily TV schedule, and sadly, they never did. Now, Compost—I mean, Comcast—wants me to pay extra to get NFL Network, and they can shove it. NFL Network's game broadcasts (which began last season) are pretty underwhelming anyway. There have been numerous glitches and FUBARs along the way, not to mention the uninspired choice of has-been Bryant Gumball as play-by-play man and Cris "Super Shill" Collinsworth as color analyst, plus Deion "Pimps R Us" Sanders on their pre-game show. Sorry, gents, I'll pass...
MORE THINGS I CAN DO WITHOUT...
These new FreeCreditReport.com TV ads featuring these bozos singing along like Weird Al Yankovic about being in the poor house because they didn't utilize this important service. These ads replaced the equally-annoying ones featuring that "I'm thinking of a number..." Pat Sajak look-alike weasel. Keep your smelling salts handy, now—I have a little revelation about FreeCreditReport.com: It's not really free! Just thought I'd share that with you...
A KISS IS STILL A KISS
I got Volume III of the Kissology DVD anthology for Christmas, and it's totally worth it for the 4th disc alone, which features one of the earliest Kiss shows ever, December 22, 1973—nearly two months before the first album came out—at a place called the Coventry in New Yawk City. It's a single-camera video, but the quality is surprisingly good (all things considered) and it's the Kiss equivalent of the Zapruder film of JFK's assassination—almost literally where it all began...
PROOFREADING, THE LOST ART...
I ate Virgina once—tasted like chicken! Almost heaven, West Virgina...CLASSIC MISHEARD LYRIC #67
"Stranger”--JEFFERSON STARSHIP (1981) “What is veiled now soon will be shown.” This line had me bamboozled for years until I finally looked it up. I thought it was something like “What is there? My suit will be shown...”
THE DE-EVOLUTION OF RADAR O'REILLY
I mentioned in my last post how the general quality of "M*A*S*H" declined after Radar went home, and it occurred to me how company clerk Walter Eugene O'Reilly (no relation to Bill, one would hope) somehow managed to age in reverse on the show over the years. When the show debuted, Radar was actually rather savvy and sassy, and even a little cocky at times. Witness the "Chief Surgeon Who?" episode when he's camped out at Henry's desk drinking his brandy and smoking his cigars when the General (played by the future Boss Hogg Sorrell Booke) comes storming in and asks him what he's doing, "D-O-I-N-G, doing! What're you doing?", to which young master O'Reilly replies, "Listening do you spell 'doing', sir!" Then flash ahead a few years to an episode where Col. Potter offers Radar one of his cigars, and Radar reluctantly asks, "Won't it stunt my growth?" then he proceeds to practically choke on it! Over the years, Radar became more and more naïve and child-like as time went on, but then all of sudden in his last episode, "Goodbye, Radar" he turned into this surly bastard, for some bizarre reason. Perhaps it had something to do with actor Gary Burghoff, who was 35 by that time, playing a kid who was what, 19 or 20? His receding hairline was probably a good hint that it was time to return to Ottumwa...
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