Y'ever listen to that Henry Lee Summer song, "I Wish I Had A Girl" and say to yourself, "Who the fuck is Leroy?!?" I have on numerous occasions...
WANNA GET AWAY?
I bet New York Governor Spitzer wishes he was in one of those Southwest Airlines commercials right about now. I believe Spitzer's man-sized predicatment was best summed up by that noted philosopher B. Bunny many, many years ago: "What a maroon!" Client #9 ain't got that many political lives, that's for sure...
SOMEBODY PLEASE HIDE HIS HELMET!
I don't know which is crazier, QB Trent Green still wanting to play football, or the St. Louis Rams signing him yesterday for $8.9 million a year for three years to do so. This guy is one more concussion away from becoming a Zucchini permanently, and I can't believe the Rams think they're going to get three games out of the man, let alone three years. Trent, buddy, I admire your competitiveness, but you're a tragedy just waiting to happen...
IF A HALL OF FAME CEREMONY FALLS IN THE WOODS AND NOBODY HEARS IT...
Did anyone waste their Monday evening on that Rock 'N' Roll Hall of Fame folderol last night? I most certainly didn't. I would've sooner watched three hours-worth of "Roseanne" reruns. Oh fuck—did I say that?!?
THE PUCK STOPS HERE—AT THE HOUSE THAT RUTH BUILT?!?
Talk is heating up about the NHL staging another outdoor regular season game next season, this time at the soon-to-be demolished Yankee Stadium in Da Bronx. Baseball purists are viewing this as heresy if the final event there is a hockey game, but I have a solution to this dilemma. Why not stage one more Yankees game there at the end of Spring Training in 2009? They could then have a big "passing the torch" ceremony similar to the way Montreal closed out The Forum about ten years ago, followed a few weeks later by imploding the place on national TV—with George Steinbrenner in it, of course...
KICKIN' IT OLD SCHOOL
I love old neon signs like these—they're becoming a dying breed. Vess Cola is a regional soft drink bottler based in St. Louis whom former Cardinal shortstop Ozzie Smith used to do endorsements for, as I recall. I stumbled across this pic online the other night, and I believe this sign is just a couple blocks north of the Ram Dome in St. Louie. There's also a beautiful (and huge) Anheuser-Busch neon sign along 40 Hiway west of downtown St. Louis that I'm dying to get a photo of at night, but it's really hard to access.
CHOICE MUSIC, INDEED
In lieu of the Hall of Fame thing and/or "Roseanne" reruns last night, I flipped over to my '70s Music Choice channel on my cable, and spent the most enjoyable hour listening to oldies from my youth that I'll probably never hear on over-the-air radio again in my lifetime unless I buy my own station and play the damn things myself! Here's a little sampling of what I heard during a 60-minute span last night:
"Holly Holy"—Neil Diamond
"Smokin' In The Boys' Room"—Brownsville Station
"One Tin Soldier"—Coven
"Only Yesterday"—The Carpenters
"Theme From Shaft"—Isaac Hayes
"Everlasting Love"—Carl Carlton
"If You Leave Me Now"—Chicago
"Burning Bridges"—Mike Curb Congregation
"I Woke Up In Love This Morning"—Partridge Family
"Have You Never Been Mellow"—Olivia Newton-John
Okay, I know about half of those songs get regular airplay on Oldies stations, but my point here is look at how well they peacefully co-exist on Music Choice. So my question to all you program directors and corporate radio suits out there, is what the fuck do you have to lose by broadening your playlists and adding songs stuff like the Carpenters and such? You can't tell me that all people want to hear is "Joy To The World", "Stayin' Alive", "Heard It Through The Grapevine" and "Play That Funky Music" every hour—no wonder terrestrial radio is dying! Take a chance, people—throw in "Run Joey Run" or "Indiana Wants Me" now and then! Even some Ohio Express would be a step in the right direction...