Saturday the 14th...

...is surely bad luck to someone out there...

DON IMUS POST-MORTEM
Just wanted to clarify my position on Dangerous Don here, lest anyone think I'm playing both sides of the fence.  I think he deserved to be fired not merely over this one incident, but because he's made a career out of this sort of thing, and the fact that he's an equal-opportunity disher-outer of vitriol is no excuse, either.  While I do admit to "piling on" sometimes in situations like this involving people I don't like, I ain't shedding any tears for Imus.  He won't be hanging out at the homeless shelter any time soon (he's loaded), and I have no doubt he'll land on his feet somewhere else, just like Marv Albert did.  Remember when he had his little scandal a few years back, and everyone thought he'd trashed his career?  Well, last time I checked, Marv's still calling NBA games on TBS/TNT, so Imus should have no problem resurrecting his precious career in satellite-land with his buddy Howard Stern.

By the way, I loved what MSNBC replaced Imus with on TV—a two-hour daily discussion of why they dropped him!  My suggestion was to run a test pattern in his place and see if anyone noticed the difference...

As for Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson, now that they got what they wanted in the firing of Imus, why don't they turn their attention to their own people who spew out the same kind of racial crap?  I'm not just talking about the Rap and Hip/Hop people, either—I'm talking about people like "Boondocks" cartoonist Aaron McGruder.  I absolutely LOVED his comic strip with Huey and Riley in the papers—it was timely, top-notch and brilliantly written—but when McGruder got big-headed and converted the strip into an animated series on Cartoon Network, it was a major disappointment to me.  There was just too much "nigga"-this and "nigga"-that coming from a 10-year-old's mouth, and after just a few episodes I grew tired of it and stopped watching.  C'mon Al and Jesse—let's see you guys bitch about that crap...

BUT WHAT WOULD BRIAN BOITANO DO?
According to U.S. Olympic Ski Team party boy Bode Miller—for whom skiing is more of a hobby than a serious pursuit—he doesn't plan to participate in the 2010 Winter Games because "there's too much emphasis on winning" in the Olympics.  Yeah, Bode, all that competition crap is pretty pointless, ain't it?  Just go smoke another bong and stop embarrassing us, numb-nuts!

LET'S JUST FIRE EVERYBODY, HUH?
I saw some schmuck on Faux News Channel yesterday morning hawking his campaign to have Rosie O'Donnell removed from "The View" because she "offends ALL Americans" with her remarks.  True, Rosie's an idiot, and heaven knows there are numerous people who I'd love to see removed from the public airways (Bill O'Reilly, Pat Robertson, Geraldo Rivera--come on down!), but if we took that attitude and fired every TV personality who offended someone, even Johnny Carson couldn't hold down a TV job if he were alive today.  If you don't like this stupid twit, then don't watch her!

THE CONTINUING CRISIS...
Stopped into Dick's Sporting Goods today to look around and stumbled across an assortment of "Texas Hold 'Em" poker tables for sale.  Must I repeat myself?  POKER IS NOT A SPORT!!!  It's no more of a sport than Monopoly or checkers, so why then is it all over ESPN, the sports page in the paper and sporting goods stores?  I don't get it...

Speaking of D'sSG, the Colorado Rapids new soccer stadium in Denver is called "Dick's Sporting Goods Park".  I couldn't help but wonder if they have signage around the stadium just like the old Dick's Root Beer stand we used to have here in Raytown which read "Parking for Dicks" that omitted the apostrophe in the most inopportune place...

YES WE CAN CAN
Top 15 Yes Tribute Band Names:
1) Yep
2) Hell Yes!
3) Yeah
4) Okey-Dokey
5) Affirmative
6) Sure, Why Not?
7) Yes-indeed-ely-doo!
8) Yepper
9) Aye, Aye
10) We'll See...
11) Fine And Dandy
12) Soitenly!
13) Sho'nuff
14) Aw, What The Hell...
15) Eeeee-Yesss! (featuring Marv Albert and White Sox announcer Hawk Harrelson)

YOUR STARTING LINEUP...
"First Base--Bugs Bunny; Second Base--Bugs Bunny; Third Base--Bugs Bunny; Shortstop--Bugs Bunny; Pitching--Bugs Bunny..."

That's what this tribute the Los Angeles Dodgers are doing tomorrow to honor Jackie Robinson kinda reminds me of.  All the players will wear Robinson's #42 for one game in honor of the 60th anniversary of Jackie breaking the color barrier in baseball.  Coincidentally, it's also nearly the 13th anniversary of when Major League Baseball sheepishly realized it should start honoring Jackie Robinson for breaking the color barrier in baseball in the wake of Ken Burns' 1994 PBS "Baseball" documentary.  No word yet on if all the players will actually change their names to Jackie Robinson for the game too...