11-17-08

...Not to be confused with Elton John's first live album, 11-17-70!

YES, VIRGINIA, IT’S A RECESSION
Once again, I heard on the radio this morning where economic “experts” still aren’t sure whether the U.S. is in a recession or not.  According to the National Association for Business Economics, approximately 96 percent of the economists polled believe a recession has started.  Ya think?!?  Why is this still even being debated at this point?  The stock market’s in the tank, no one’s spending money, there are massive lay-offs everywhere, and unemployment figures are spiking like my blood pressure does while watching Bill O'Reilly—what more evidence do you goomers need?  This is akin to wondering if Dubya was a good President or not.  Yes, kids, it’s a bloody recession, already!!

WORD UP!
The term “meh” is now officially recognized as a word by the Collins English Dictionary.  I’ve found it to be a rather handy word myself, as an “expression of indifference or boredom or an adjective meaning mediocre or boring” according to the dictionary.  And just like “d’oh!”, the word appears to have gained popularity on “The Simpsons”, yes indeed-ely-doo…

MEH, PERSONIFIED
Anyone get a load of Bob Costas and Co. hyping NBC’s “Go Green” campaign during last night's “Sunday Night Football” telecast?  I cringed while Costas, Keith Olbermann, Chris Collinsworth, et al, sat there and recited things they’ve individually done to help the environment in the last year as if it were some sort of class assignment.  It all sounded about as sincere as a Don Imus apology, and what’s the bet most of these guys drive Hummers, hmm?  This little campaign of theirs is nothing but fashionable PR posturing devoid of any substance whatsoever—just like when President Ford wanted everyone to wear “WIN” buttons so we could Whip Inflation Now.  Yeah, that’ll make it all better…

MAMMA MIA!
Seems the Securities & Exchange Commission is accusing Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban of insider trading on a stock deal to avoid $750,000 in losses over some company called Mamma.com.  Huh?  $750,000 is pocket change to this guy—why would he risk getting in hot water over that?  What a maroon…

STILL WORTH THE WAIT?
“Can someone explain why they’ve already put tickets on sale for Celine Dion at Sprint Center, when the concert isn’t scheduled until November 15, 2008?!?  I’ve never heard of concert tickets being put on sale nearly a year in advance before.  Is this to allow her legion of fans (all 14 of ‘em) to schedule their vacations from work around it or something?”—B. Holland, November 27, 2007

In a juicy bit of irony, Celine Dion fans in K.C. will just have to wait a tad longer to see their heroine in concert, as a throat ailment has forced the postponement of Saturday’s Sprint Center concert until January.  I suppose a couple more months won’t kill them…

"WELL, HONK MY HOOTER—YOU SPEAK ENGLISH!"
One of my guilty pleasures every morning before I go to work is Univision's equivalent to "Good Morning America" called "Despierta America", mostly because of the cutie on the show named Ana Maria.  I've never understood a thing she's said until today when she was interviewing actor Will Smith (who is mildly fluent in Spanish) when all of a sudden Ana Maria began speaking to Will in English!  Very fluid English, at that.  Shades of John Cusack in Better Off Dead with that French hottie Monique...

UNCLEAR OF THE CONCEPT?
I just had to chortle a couple times when I saw that #24 Tulsa got slammed 70-30 by the University of Houston on Saturday.  And that ain’t no basketball score—that’s tackle football!  Evidently TU misunderstood the Top 25 bylaw that no Top 25 team should ever be beaten by 40 points, let alone allow 70 to an opponent!  BTW, why is Tulsa called the “Golden Hurricane”?  By the time hurricanes make it to northeastern Oklahoma, they’re tropical storms anyway.

AT THE MOVIES
A couple quick reviews for you, as I caught up on some DVD watching over the weekend.  I finally got around to viewing The Bucket List, and it wasn’t too bad.  Even Jack Nicholson was entertaining here—as entertaining as a rich curmudgeon asshole with terminal brain cancer can be, anyway—and Morgan Freeman was his usual solid self.  And director Rob Reiner was good enough to keep his film at a tolerable length of just over an hour and a half instead of subscribing to the “bigger/longer is better” theory.  I give Bucket List about a 6.5.

Being a child of the ‘70s, I decided to waste an hour and a half of my life on Will Ferrell’s Semi-Pro, and although it exceeded my expectations on some levels, it was semi-funny at best.  I think it actually would’ve been much better without Ferrell (this generation’s Chevy Chase) and his phony athlete shtick, which is growing really tiresome.  This movie also could’ve been infinitely funnier if the producers had mined the treasure trove of hilarious (and true) stories and characters of the old American Basketball Association instead of putting out yet another mediocre (meh?) Will Farrell vehicle.  They did occasionally manage to pay proper homage to the ABA here, like the bikini-clad cheerleaders (the old Miami Floridians really had them) along with some of the other silly promotions and gimmicks ABA teams pulled off to put fannies in the seats.  I also liked the accuracy of the old ABA uniforms in the film, esp. those worn by the Spirits of St. Louis and New York Nets.  Overall, I give Semi-Pro a 5.0.  Without Farrell, it might’ve been a 6.0...