Concert Trek - Episode 18

86) John Entwistle/Bob Harvey Band (Friday, October 8, 1998—Roadhouse Ruby’s) Ticket price: $12.00

I nearly leapt out of my chair at work the day I read in the paper that John Entwistle and his band were coming to town in the fall of ‘98.  I was even more delighted when I found out the tickets for this show were only 12 bucks!  Little did I know at the time that I would actually get to meet the man himself, too…

My friend Tom and I arrived at Roadhouse Ruby’s (formerly known as Guitars & Cadillacs) in suburban Olathe early enough to snag a table directly in front of the stage about halfway back, and it was a great vantage point.  A local outfit called the Bob Harvey Band opened the show, and they were fairly tolerable.  They did a couple C.C.R. covers that sounded pretty decent, anyway.

Long about 9:30, The Ox and his crew ambled onto the stage and opened with The Who’s “The Real Me” with guitarist Godfrey Townsend (no relation to Pete) on vocals.  G. Townsend reminded me of one those stereotypical over-the-hill Rock stars portrayed in the movies, and although he was a competent guitar player, he was a barely-serviceable singer.  The show was plenty loud, but the sound mix was terrible, and Entwistle’s bass was hard to pick out from the rest of the cacophony of noise.  The set list was a mix of John’s Who classics and favorites from his underrated solo career, including “My Size”, “Success Story”, “Had Enough” and “Trick Of The Light”, with The Ox singing about half of them and Townsend singing the rest.  A surprise inclusion was Roger Daltrey’s 1985 solo tribute to Keith Moon “Under A Raging Moon” featuring drummer Steve Luongo and “a drum solo almost as long as a Winston 100 cigarette,” as John quipped.

About midway through the show, I had the temerity to wander up by stage right in front of the speakers, and man, did I feel the power of the mighty Thunderfingers.  I was a mere seven feet away from The Ox and got to watch those famous fingers work their magic up close—a major thrill for me!  Meantime, at the stroke of Midnight as October 9th dawned, it was officially John’s 54th birthday, so the rest of the band led us all in singing “Happy Birthday To You” and presented the man with a pornographic b-day card.  The show wrapped up a little while later with the Who classic “Young Man Blues”, and I was a bit disappointed at two glaring omissions:  “The Quiet One” from Face Dances and even more surprisingly, John didn’t play “Boris The Spider”.  Still, for a taste of this show, I highly recommend John’s Left For Live—Deluxe Edition CD, featuring highlights from this tour, during which Entwistle nearly went bankrupt, even though he insisted on doing it because he wanted to get out and play for the people.  Dude, I would’ve gladly paid more than $12—he could’ve easily charged $20-25 a ticket and gotten it.

To be honest, overall this was a rather so-so concert, buuuuut…after the show, Tom and I hung around by the back door near the stage in hopes of meeting The Ox.  The roadies eventually re-directed us outside and had us “get in queue” out by the (“Magic”?) tour bus behind the strip mall where John was already signing autographs, and eventually I found myself standing toe-to-toe with one of my idols!  I wisely had the forethought to bring along my CD insert sleeve from The Who By Numbers featuring John’s famous cover drawing for him to sign.  He didn’t say much while he was signing everyone’s stuff, as there was some annoying groupie chick off to the right babbling away and distracting him the whole time.  I wanted to shake John’s hand, but since that’s where his pen was, I settled for patting him on the right shoulder and said, “Happy birthday, sir!” and he thanked me.  Not terribly original of me, but at least I didn’t say something stupid.  Fuckin-A, I met The Ox!  To date, this was my greatest brush with greatness ever on earth in this hemisphere.

SET LIST:  The Real Me/My Size/Sometimes/Success Story/Trick Of The Light/Had Enough/Endless Vacation/Too Late The Hero/Shakin’ All Over/905/Darker Side Of Night/Under A Raging Moon/Heaven And Hell  ENCORES:  My Wife/Young Man Blues


87) Kiss/Econoline Crush (Tuesday, December 16, 1998—Omaha Civic Auditorium) Ticket price: $30.00


The Psycho Circus tour was a somewhat half-hearted affair, as Kiss only played a couple dozen shows on it, and the closest they came to K.C. was the former home of the Kansas City-Omaha Kings, the Civic Auditorium, so this wound up being my first concert outside of the states of Missouri and Kansas.  Since it was almost wintertime, I was reluctant to buy a ticket in advance in case there was a snowstorm that night, but fortunately the weather was bright and clear—although a tad frigid—for my three-hour drive up I-29.  When I arrived at the concert at 6:00, I was surprised to find a zillion people lined up around the arena.  After I parked the car, I was accosted by a ticket scalper and he said the tickets were $35 face-value, but he offered me one for 30, so I snagged it, even though I normally don’t condone patronizing these schmucks.  That’s when I learned that the show was General Admission.  G.A. seating for Kiss?!?  Didn’t those Who and AC/DC concert tragedies teach us anything? Oh well, no harm no foul, I guess, since there were no fatalities, although the Kiss Alive Forever book mentions that Paul Stanley pleaded early on in the show with the fans in the front row to give some room to a small child whom he thought was being crushed, and they eventually handed the kid over the barricade to safety, but I don’t recall that incident.  As it turned out, I managed to literally have a whole row myself near the top of the building, as I found a nice little one-seater that suited me fine.

I do recall that three lines into Kiss’ opening number, “Psycho Circus”, Stanley’s microphone crapped out on him and he had to borrow Gene’s for a while.  Their new replica Destroyer costumes looked great, and the new stage was kinda cool, especially Peter Criss’ new drum riser that when lifted skyward during his solo had nothing but air below it, as it was suspended from above by chains.  And this time we had not one, but two light-up Kiss logos adorning the stage.  The other new wrinkle for this tour was the 3-D effects on the video screens, which when viewed through the cheesy 3-D glasses that were given away at the doors, made the band’s guitars, drum sticks, tongues, etc., appear to be coming right at you (to varying degrees of success).

The album Psycho Circus was the first (and most likely the only) one featuring the entire original lineup on it since the ‘70s, at least by outward appearances.  Turns out that Criss only played on the track he sang on, as was the case with Ace Frehley, and the rest of the album was Gene Simmons, Paul Stanley and session musicians.  Not surprisingly, Kiss only performed three songs from it—the title track, Ace’s “Into The Void” (including his extended solo) and Simmons’ “Within”, the latter of which sounded like crap live because Gene couldn’t hack recreating his original high-end vocals.  During Ace’s solo, I could see Gene through my binoculars next to the stairway below stage right touching up his make-up before returning to the stage.  I also spotted the cup where he drinks his fake blood from too.  The rest of the show was vintage Kiss and I could even feel the heat from the pyro during “100,000 Years” from all the way up top.  Ace also added a new little whirly-gig firework gizmo on the head stock of his light-up guitar that shot sparks during his “Rock And Roll All Nite” solo.

Since I had to piss near the end of the show, I decided to take in the encores from floor level in the back while Peter sang “Beth”—I wish they’d actually play this one on guitar instead of always having Peter singing along to the backing track.  “Detroit Rock City” followed, as did “Black Diamond” and the confetti storm thereof.  While not quite as good as the Kiss shows I saw on the 1996-97 Reunion Tour, this was still well worth the little road trip to Omaha.  I was looking forward to catching a couple more shows on the Psycho Circus tour, but there weren’t any more around these parts after this one.

As usual, Kiss brought along a good support act, and Econoline Crush put on a very energetic opening set.  They were kind of a cross between Alice In Chains and The Cult, and I was impressed enough with them that I bought their debut CD a little while after that.  Unlike most of the the young bands that were hot at that time, EC actually appeared to be enjoying themselves while playing on-stage.  Too bad the band never went anywhere after that…

SET LIST:  Psycho Circus/Shout It Out Loud/Deuce/Do You Love Me/Firehouse/Shock Me/Let Me Go, Rock ‘N’ Roll/Calling Dr. Love/Into The Void/King Of The Night Time World/God Of Thunder/Within/Peter Criss drum solo/Cold Gin/Love Gun/100,000 Years/Rock And Roll All Nite  ENCORES:  Beth/Detroit Rock City/Black Diamond

88) Ted Nugent/Night Ranger/Quiet Riot/Slaughter (Friday, July 23, 1999—Sandstone Amphitheater) Ticket price: Free

We weren’t even planning to attend this concert, but a co-worker of mine managed to win two free tickets earlier in the week via some contest at a nearby bar, and he was good enough to offer them to me since he really wasn’t into Nugent or any of the other bands.  And since you can’t beat free, and since it was Tom’s birthday too, we went.


Tom and I arrived just as Slaughter was finishing their encore “Up All Night”.  I don’t think we missed much anyway.  We were planning to rent a couple chairs for the lawn when one of the ushers advised us that since the show was nowhere near sold-out, we could sit in the back section of seats if we wanted, so we snagged a couple good ones right smack in the center.  Quiet Riot came out a little while later and played a brief, but spirited set.  I so wanted to walk up to singer Kevin DuBrow and (in my best Chandler Bing voice) say, “Could your wig BE any more obvious?” (see pic).  QR only played five songs, but it was a good and tight set, and the crowd seemed to enjoy them.  Alas, as usual at Sandstone, the sound was abysmal—way too much bass and drums—and it would not get any better the rest of the night.

SET LIST:  Sign Of The Times/Slick Black Cadillac/Mama Weer All Crazee Now/Cum On Feel The Noize/Metal Health

During the set change, while Tom was making a beer run, a fight broke out right in front of where we were sitting between two stupid drunk fucks who just had to be all macho for our entertainment.  In fact, we were surrounded by all sorts of morons, and I swear, Tom and I were the only two people in the place without tattoos!  Night Ranger came on a bit later and played a fairly enthusiastic set.  I was never a big fan of theirs back in the ‘80s, but they acquitted themselves quite well live, and like Quiet Riot, the crowd seemed to dig them.

SET LIST:  Touch Of Madness/Rumors In The Air/Sing Me Away/Four In The Morning (I Can’t Take Any More)/Sentimental Street/When You Close Your Eyes/Coming Of Age/Don’t Tell Me You Love Me  ENCORES:  Sister Christian/Rock In America


It had been 20 years and one month (almost to the day) when my personal concert odyssey began with Ted Nugent at Arrowhead Stadium in 1979, and almost 17 years since the last time I’d seen him in concert and a lot had changed.  Ted apparently decided he no longer needed a second guitarist/vocalist, choosing to do all the singing himself (bad idea).  Nugent was now down to a three-piece band, which included a familiar face, one Tommy Aldridge (formerly of Black Oak Arkansas, Pat Travers, Ozzy Osbourne and Whitesnake) on the drums, as well as a bass player I didn’t recognize.  Also unlike the Nugent of yore, this show wasn’t very loud.  I could remember a time when the Nuge was determined to make one’s ears bleed at his concerts, but this almost made the New Christy Minstrels sound like Motorhead!  Opening with a very flat version of “Yank Me, Crank Me” and wearing a headset microphone, Terrible Ted just wandered aimlessly around the stage and played, and the usually frenetic “Wang Dang Sweet Poontang” was rendered utterly lifeless on this night.  The set did include a couple surprises, like “Snakeskin Cowboys” and his ode to thrill-seeking hunters, “Fred Bear”, which Ted augmented with a cute little campfire at center stage—never mind that it was already 95 degrees out!  I’m surprised he also didn’t lead us all in a few choruses of “Kumbaya” (sp?).

Ted’s usually-humorous macho-bravado between-song patter was strangely subdued too, and thanks to the murky sound, I couldn’t make out what he was saying half the time, anyway.  Sadly, the beginning of the end of Ted’s tenure as one of my idols took place when he introduced “Kiss My Ass” by going off on one of his now-infamous bigoted “Get the fuck out of America if you can’t speak English” rants.  Don’t get me wrong—I love the song “Kiss My Ass”, and I merely replace the liberals in Ted’s little roll call at the end with the likes of Bill O’Reilly, Ann Coulter, et al—but I do not attend Rock ‘N’ Roll concerts to listen to political diatribes.  Unfortunately, Nugent is totally unrepentant about this, and in fact, has gotten even more militant as time has passed.  The Motor City Madman was no longer talking to me through his guitar, but from out of his ass.

“Cat Scratch Fever” ended the set, with Ted pulling off his usual shtick of shooting a flaming arrow at a defenseless (decoy) guitar from 15 paces—a shot that even I could make.  He launched into “Great White Buffalo” for the encore, but Tom and I had seen enough and headed up the hill to leave, and naturally as we did, the sound suddenly got better.  I never dreamed I’d see the day when I’d ever leave a Ted Nugent concert before it was over, but the times had changed.  If I’d paid to see this concert, I’d have been pissed, and even for free, it was just barely okay, at best.  Even after 20 some-odd years, Kiss was still able to kick my ass in concert.  Ted Nugent failed miserably at it.  How the mighty had fallen…

SET LIST:  Yank Me, Crank Me/Free-For-All/Dog Eat Dog/Snakeskin Cowboys/Kiss My Ass/Paralyzed/Wang Dang Sweet Poontang/Fred Bear/Stranglehold/Cat Scratch Fever  ENCORE:  Great White Buffalo

89) Joe Walsh (Saturday, July 24, 1999—Kauffman Stadium) Ticket price: Free


Royals/Kauffman Stadium hosted several big-time mega-concerts back in the ‘70s like Nugent, Chicago, Santana, Steve Miller Band, Peter Frampton, et al, but I never got to see any shows there, as by the time I became a concert-goer, all the big shows were staged across the parking lot at Arrowhead, so this was a first for me.  So was sitting through a crappy baseball game first to see a concert, as the Royals were pummeled by the Oakland A’s 12-2 prior to the free post-game concert by Joe Walsh.  I attended the show with a female friend who drove up with her new husband from Joe’s hometown of Wichita, and it was a bit of an awkward evening as neither of them were very talkative—jeez, I hate being the third wheel!!


It only took about 30 minutes following the game for the roadies to set up the makeshift stage, and the sound quality—although somewhat lacking—was still far superior to what Tom and I heard the night before.  Ever the silly one, Joe came on stage and immediately donned one of those fluorescent orange windbreakers the highway workers wear, and claimed “I’m cold!” even though it was hotter than blazes out, and he left the thing on all night!  Although it was a bit odd having the stadium lights on throughout the show, Joe made the best of it and turned in a surprisingly decent set of hits, including his old James Gang classics “Funk #49” and “Walk Away”, along with more recent stuff like “The Confessor” and “Ordinary Average Guy”.  He saved his biggies for last of course, ending the show with “Life’s Been Good” followed by “Rocky Mountain Way” for the encore.  One song I was shocked he didn’t do was “All Night Long” (from Urban Cowboy), but I never much liked that one anyway.  One I knew he wouldn’t do, but secretly hoped for was “I.L.B.T.’s” (as in “I Like Big Tits”) from 1983.  Can’t have everything, I guess.  All things considered, this wasn’t a bad little show, and an improvement over the one I saw the night before.  As Joe often says, “How ya DOIN’?”

90) Chicago/The Doobie Brothers (Sunday, August 8, 1999—Sandstone Amphitheater) Ticket price: Free

Damn, three free concerts in a row!  This time it was yours truly who won the freebies on the radio on 101-The Fox for knowing what year Supertramp's Famous Last Words... came out (1982).  This marked the second time I’d seen Chicago in concert without paying a dime to do so.  These weren’t even lawn tickets for free—these were actual seats, and they were surprisingly good, too.


Since this was a co-headlining tour, we didn’t know until showtime who would open up, and it turned out to be the Brothers Doobie who played first.  They opened with a song I wasn’t familiar with, then kicked it into gear with “Rockin’ Down The Highway”.  To my surprise, there was no Michael McDonald to be found on stage, and guitarist Pat Simmons later explained that “he's sick—of us!”  I’m not so sure he was kidding, either.  Just as well, because apart from “Takin’ It To The Streets” (which Simmons sang in McDonald’s place) and “It Keeps You Runnin’”, I never much cared for the wimpy jazz/fusion-esque Michael McDonald-era Doobies, and much preferred the old-school real Rock ‘N’ Roll Tom Johnston-era Doobies, which is what we got on this night.  Johnston looked healthy, sang enthusiastically and sounded great.  The rest of the band included guitarist John McFee, drummers Keith Knudsen and Michael Hossack, a lanky bassist named Skylark, and a sax player named Mike Russo who emerged every so often from the shadows.  Even more surprising, the sound was pretty good, especially once the band got cooking.  They covered their big hits, as expected, plus they added a new song called “Can’t Stand To Lose” which wasn’t half-bad.  “China Grove” and “Listen To The Music” were the encores, during which a couple of the Chicago guys joined the Doobs on stage and sang along.  Overall, a very nice 90-minute set.

SET LIST:  Don’t Believe A Word/Rockin’ Down The Highway/Dangerous/Jesus Is Just Alright/Slat Key Soquel Rag/Can’t Stand To Lose/Take Me In Your Arms (Rock Me)/The Doctor/Takin’ It To The Streets/Little Bitty Pretty One/Black Water/Long Train Runnin’  ENCORES:  China Grove/Listen To The Music


Chicago opened with a couple tunes they didn’t play when I saw them in ’88, namely “Make Me Smile”, “Colour My World” and "Old Days".  They started off a little flat, but righted the ship eventually by about the fourth song.  They made my night by playing two other omissions from ’88, “(I’ve Been) Searchin’ So Long” and "Feelin' Stronger Every Day", both sung by Jason Scheff, who had long ago replaced Peter Cetera, and is almost a dead-ringer for him, vocally.  The band was still tight, with Robert Lamm on one keyboard, Bill Champlin on another, guitarist Keith Howland and drummer Tris Imboden.  But it was the horn section that stole the show, as usual.  Trombonist James Pankow was especially animated, using his instrument as a sort of extension of his manhood, you might say, while saxophonist Walt Parazaider and trumpeter Lee Loughnane traded solos throughout the show, and all three sounded great. 

After running through most of their big hits, Chicago threw in a zinger. “We’ve been in a blast furnace all summer, so just use your imagination here,” Pankow announced, before they launched into a riotous rendition of “Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow”, complete with light-up snowman, fake snow falling from above the stage, and a corpulent roadie posing as an elf.  Come to find out later that Chicago had a Christmas CD due out soon, hence the yuletide frivolity.  While introducing the band members, Robert Lamm remarked how nice the weather was here for a change, and added, “I remember doing the backstroke here last year,” during the usual heavy rains Chicago brings to Kansas City whenever they play outdoors.  They wrapped the show up with rousing version of “25 Or 6 To 4”, and for once, it didn’t rain a drop during an outdoor Chicago concert in Kansas City!  An outstanding concert all the way around, too.

SET LIST:  Make Me Smile/Colour My World/Make Me Smile (Reprise)/(I’ve Been) Searchin’ So Long/Free/Hard Habit To Break/Call On Me/Old Days/Look Away/Feelin’ Stronger Every Day/Saturday In The Park/Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow/Just You ‘N’ Me/ Beginnings/Hard To Say I’m Sorry/Get Away/Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?/I’m A Man  ENCORES:  In The Mood/25 Or 6 To 4

All in a blog's work

SLOBO ILIJEVSKI, 1949-2008
Was saddened to learn of the death last week of former St. Louis Steamers/Storm/Ambush goalkeeper Slobo Ilijevski at age 58.  He was playing in an over-55 soccer tournament in Seattle and suffered a torn aorta apparently while diving to stop a shot, and died later in the hospital of heart failure.  Back in the ‘80s, indoor soccer was a major vice for me, and whenever my beloved MISL Kansas City Comets played the dreaded Team Steam from St. Louie, it was about as intense a rivalry as you’ll ever find, especially from about 1982 through ‘86.  To us, Comets-Steamers made Ohio St.-Michigan, Yankees-Red Sox or Chiefs-Raiders look like pillow fights by comparison. Although we always respected Slobo and his evil teammates Don Ebert, Steve Pecher, Carl Rose, Jeff Cacciatore, Tony Glavin, Redmond Lane, Tony Bellinger, Ricky Davis, et al, my friend Tom and I were known to often hurl invective at Slobo and his minions, especially during the playoffs.  Ebert and Rose were the two I hated the most, but Slobo was right up there with them.  From what I hear, he apparently was really a very nice man off the field, but we hated his guts whenever he was on the pitch.  I’ll never forget the sheer elation we felt the night the Comets finally overcame those bastard Steamers on April 21, 1985 when midfielder Tasso Koutsoukos snuck one past Slobo to win 4-3 in OT to clinch the team’s first playoff series victory ever.  Winning the championship would’ve been anti-climactic that year…

Ironically, Ilijevski was one of the few St. Louis players who didn’t eventually wind up playing for the Comets (like Pecher, Glavin and others later did), as by the late ‘80s, the two team rosters were almost interchangeable.  Known as the "ageless wonder", Slobo was sort of the Dominik Hasek of indoor soccer, as he played well into his 40’s and seemingly got better the more he aged.  He was the heart and soul of St. Louis soccer even after his playing days ended, remaining very active in the futbol community there, playing a similar role to what Gino Schiraldi and Enzo DiPede do here in Kansas City.  Rest in peace, Slobo—you were a great warrior and one of my favorite sports villains/enemies…

EXPLANATION PLEASE…
Why is it when the media and/or the military report war casualties, the individual soldiers are always referred to as "troops"?  Isn’t a troop a group of people, as in Boy Scout troop?  I never have understood that…

HOPE I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE…
…who does this.  Have you ever bought Hamburger Helper at the store and forgotten to buy the meat?!?  I’ve done this a couple times now, even though the key component of Hamburger Helper is indeed hamburger!

HOLY YAWN, BATMAN!
I must be the only one who is very nonplussed about the new Batman flick that just came out.  I’ve had trouble getting into the big-screen Caped Crusader movies because they’re nothing like what I was raised on.  Sorry folks, but there’s only one true Batmobile, and the only Batman that’s officially recognized in my house is the mayor of Quahog himself, the great Adam West.  The least they could do in these new Batman flicks is throw in a few Biffs and Zowies now and then…

REAL MEN OF GENIUS
The Budweiser folks need to salute whoever it is that does the programming schedule for TV Land.  In their infinite wisdom, they decided to air Apollo 13 on Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday night this past weekend.  Can’t you just see these guys brainstorming at their committee meeting?  "What a stroke of ingenuity—let’s air the same movie three nights in a row!!  And better yet, let’s butcher it up with commercial breaks every five minutes and fill them with promos for this vapid new reality show we’re hyping featuring that big dumb oaf George Foreman—that’ll surely keep the viewers glued to the tube…"

Don’t get me wrong, Apollo 13 is a dandy film and a favorite of mine, but jeez Louise—can’t they at least have a little variety in their program schedule?  TBS does this same crap—airing the same flick on back-to-back nights, and instead of promos, they insert that inane "Dinner & A Movie" palaver with these supercilious twits prattling on about nothing.  Is it any wonder that cable TV ratings are plummeting faster than Mel Gibson’s career?

CLASSIC MISHEARD LYRIC #90
"Destroyer"—THE KINKS (1981)  "Feeling guilty, feeling scared—hidden cameras everywhere…"  Is it just me, or doesn’t it sound like Ray Davies sings "hidden candles everywhere"?

THIS ONE’S JUST TOO EASY!
John "Cougar" Mellencamp says he now considers himself an "ex-Rock Star".  I musta missed that memo somewhere along the way—I was unaware that he ever was one... (sorry, Dr. S!)

TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE?
I chuckled when I read that singer Amy Winehouse’s husband was sentenced to over two years in the pokey for beating up a pub landlord in England while intoxicated.  Imagine that—he’s every bit as fucked-up as she is!  Okay, explain to me again why I should be impressed by this skank?  I’ve listened to Winehouse a few times and have been majorly underwhelmed by her so-called "brilliance".  I’d almost rather listen to "ex-Rock Star" Mellencamp…

WHO DAT?
Interesting commentary from The Who’s Roger Daltrey this week on the state of the music biz, and more specifically the listening habits of today’s music collectors.  Roger sez:  "They've destroyed the form, as soon's it went digital.  The CD was a confidence trick.  It wasn't just music that people used to buy, it was a total art form. ... I think that's what people like.  They like it personal.  They like vinyl because if you scratch vinyl, it'll be scratched, but it'll be your scratch.  It will only be on your record.  Now for people, (music) is just not a big part of their lives.  It's like background noise.  There's just so much else going on, isn't there?"

Not so sure I agree with him totally.  I may be one of the few dominoes left standing, and music is as big as it ever was in my life.  Disregarding my current iPod habits, I still generally listen to my CDs as entire units from start-to-finish without skipping around on tracks, just as I would’ve on vinyl.  True, as I myself have lamented on the blog, the compact disc killed the album cover/sleeves as an art form, but I don’t really miss hearing the music with all the snap, crackle and pop of vinyl records.

As for the ‘Orrible ‘Oo, their performance on VH-1’s "Rock Honors" presentation last week weren’t too shabby, and it never ceases to amaze me that Pete and Roger call still bring it at their advanced ages.  I really think young master Zac Starkey on the drums has helped energize them a bit over the last ten years or so since he’s played for them.  And I know I’m biased when it comes to the bass position in this band, but I still cringed watching Pino Palladino play so timidly on the solo bass runs during "My Generation".  It almost looked like he was scared to touch his own bass strings.  I know I shouldn’t pick on Palladino, because he is indeed a fine bassist—he stood out on Pete Townshend’s "Face The Face" in 1985, as well as on Elton John’s "Simple Life" from The One in 1992—but Pino, buddy, do The Ox proud—play that song like you got a pair!!

Meanwhile, it seems that Pete and Roger have decided to tour America again this fall, but they’re already squabbling over what songs to play, as Townshend wants to do more of his new stuff while Daltrey wants to stick with the classics.  Given the flaccid quality of Pete’s more recent work, I tend to side with Rog on this one.

Concert Trek - Episode 17

81) George Thorogood & The Destroyers/Wide Mouth Mason (Saturday, August 16, 1997—Beaumont Club) Ticket price: $18.50

The Beaumont Club in Kansas City’s Westport drinking district is easily the worst venue I’ve ever attended a big-time concert at.  It doubles as a Country & Western bar/nightclub, and serves neither purpose very well.  It’s your basic dive, the layout of the place is poor for concerts and I swear, my front porch (see above left) is bigger than the Beaumont’s stage!  My friend Tom and I were forced to stand at the top of the stairway which led to an auxiliary bar just to get a good vantage point.

The opening act, a trio named Wide Mouth Mason, started early and were quite good.  They played about 45 minutes’ worth of alterna-Rock and blues, and the guitarist and drummer were standouts, as I recall.  After a very brief set change, the strains of Barry McGuire’s “Eve of Destruction” played over the P.A., signaling that Lonesome George and the boys were about to begin, as they bounded onto the stage and opened with “Long Gone”.  It wasn’t long before some dillweed decided to stand right in front of me and Tom, blocking our view, in spite of our attempts to show the fucker that we were there first.  He and his underage girlfriends eventually moved elsewhere, but not before I nearly threw my hip and back out while trying to get comfortable along the stairway railing.

Anyway, Thorogood and Co. rocked the house, playing pretty much the same set as they did in ’95, only with some new tunes added from their latest CD, Rockin’ My Life Away.  The longer they played, the tighter they got, and the band was like a runaway freight train by show’s end.  Even though they were limited by Beaumont’s microscopic stage, George and crew managed to put on a fine show.  About the only disappointment was the total lack of Chuck Berry songs on the set list.  Oh well, still a dandy show in spite of it being such a crappy venue.

SET LIST:  Long Gone/Who Do You Love?/Get Back Into Rockin'/Night Time/I Drink Alone/One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer/If You Don't Start Drinkin' (I'm Gonna Leave)/I'll Have The Usual/The Sky Is Crying/Get A Haircut/Howlin' For My Baby/Bad To The Bone/Gear Jammer/Move It On Over/What A Price/You Talk Too Much  ENCORE:  Rockin' My Life Away

82) The Rainmakers/Arthur Dodge (Friday, September 19, 1997—Liberty Hall, Lawrence, KS) Ticket price: $10.00

Kansas City’s Rainmakers were a band that I really came to love long after their initial break-up in the early ‘90s.  For more on the band, here’s my original blog tribute to them.  Once I finally embraced their music in the mid-‘90s, I was really fired up to finally see them live in concert, as they had a reputation as a top-flight live act.  They were heavily-promoted by Classic Rock station KY-102 during the band’s heyday from 1986-89, and their first three albums were pretty darn good stuff.  Strange irony that this concert took place the night after “the day the music died”, so to speak, as KY-102 was killed the day before by the soulless corporate radio suits and replaced by an equally-soulless Alternative Rock format.

Liberty Hall is an old movie theater on the famed Massachusetts St. strip in Lawrence near K.U. that was converted into an 800-seat (or so) concert hall, and it turned out to be a nifty place to see a show.  Our view was outstanding from the balcony, and the sound was plenty loud during the Rainmakers’ set.  The band had reformed a couple times in the ‘90s, and were touring in support of their new CD Skin with new bassist Michael Bliss replacing the departed Rich Ruth.  Opening with their biggest hit, “Let My People Go-Go”, the band was surprisingly animated on stage, particularly singer and leader Bob Walkenhorst.  I was surprised that they didn’t lean all that much on the new record, choosing instead to play nearly all of their first album and most of the second one, 1987’s Tornado.  In rolling through their old favorites, they did some altered arrangements on a few of them, like “Doomsville” and “Long Gone Long” from the first album, freshening them up with Steve Phillips’ excellent slide guitar work.  Drummer Pat Tomek was a solid timekeeper as well, and the band was very tight, as expected.

The song “Hoo-Dee-Hoo” from the Rainmakers’ third album The Good News And The Bad News was a highlight, as was “Reckoning Day” from that album, and the band closed the show with “Rockin’ At The T-Dance” following a couple encores and over two hours’ worth of music.  The only glaring omissions from the set list were “Tornado Of Love” and “Small Circles” from Tornado, and overall this was an outstanding concert.  The Rainmakers certainly came as advertised—a mighty fine live band.

The opening act was a band called Arthur Dodge, and they played your basic Alternative Rock clap-trap, and weren’t terribly good at it.  It didn’t help that the sound mix was murky and the vocals were drowned out most of the time.  My friend Phil said he recognized the lead singer as a guy he’d played drums with in a band many years before.   Small world…

SET LIST:  Let My People Go-Go/Different Rub/Wages Of Sin/Skin/Long Gone Long/Shiny Shiny/Information/No Romance/Did You See The Lightning/ Snakedance/Remember Me By/Window/Reddleman Coming/Hoo-Dee-Hoo/Hunger Moon/Lakeview Man/Reckoning Day/Million Miles Away/Eclipse Has Begun/Nobody Knows/ Downstream/I Talk With My Hands  ENCORES:  Good Sons & Daughters/Drinkin' On The Job/Daydream Believer/Doomsville/Rockin’ At The T-Dance


83) The Rainmakers/Jeff Black (Saturday, November 29, 1997—Beaumont Club) Ticket price: $12.00


As the Lynyrd Skynyrd lyric goes, “I’ve tried everything in my life—the things I like, I try ‘em twice…” and so it goes with The Rainmakers, as they played K.C. proper for the first time in ages just a couple months after their highly successful Lawrence gig.  Too bad it had to be at such a shitty venue.  At least we were able to actually sit in seats for this one, although people kept using the space in front of us as an aisle half the time—beaver biscuits!!

Tom and I were graced by yet another opening act performance by singer Jeff Black, whom we’d previously seen open for John Hiatt a couple years before.  Sad to report that Jeff hadn’t improved much from that first time, where he reminded me of a street singer playing for tips.  Picture the late Chris Farley with an acoustic guitar, and you get the idea.  His set was mercifully short, too.

Opening this time with "To The Hum", followed by “Let My People Go-Go”, the Rainmakers came on right at 8:00 and had the joint jumpin’ from the get-go (Go-Go?).  They made a few changes to the set list, adding “Another Guitar” from 1994’s Flirtin’ With The Universe, as well as a couple more songs from the new Skin album.  The band seemed to enjoy themselves, and Bob Walkenhorst was quite animated on stage once again, which seems to be his nature.  It was a very good show, indeed, but I enjoyed the Lawrence show more, which can be directly attributed to the venue and not the band.  When they played “Downstream”, the Rainmakers nearly brought the house down.  They returned for an encore featuring “Drinkin’ On The Job”, but were unable to finish with “Rockin’ At The T-Dance” because they ran long and had to quit so the club could let the regular redneck shit-stomper crowd in at 10:30.  To date, I haven’t set foot in the place since, either—the Beaumont Club sucks!

SET LIST:  To The Hum/Let My People Go-Go/Good Sons And Daughters/Different Rub/Wages Of Sin/Long Gone Long/ Skin/Shiny Shiny/Information/No Romance/Did You See the Lightning/ Snakedance/Remember Me By/Wilder Side/Reddleman Coming/Spend It On Love/Reckoning Day/Hunger Moon/Hoo-Dee-Hoo/Another Guitar/ Million Miles Away/Eclipse Has Begun/Nobody Knows/Downstream/I Talk With My Hands  ENCORES:  Doomsville/Drinkin' On The Job/Proud Mary


84) The Rainmakers (Saturday, April 16, 1998—Mill Creek Park) Ticket price: Free


I just couldn’t get enough of these guys during 1997-98, and this one was a freebie. It was also the one and only time I’ve attended a concert while on the clock at my workplace! 

At the time, I was working at St. Luke’s Hospital near the famed Country Club Plaza and was picking up some extra hours on the weekends reorganizing one of our file rooms in X-Ray.  The annual AIDS Walk event was being held right across the street in Mill Creek Park, with The Rainmakers headlining the post-walk concert.  Since I had no adult supervision (i.e., no managers were around), I snuck down the hill and enjoyed the proceedings for a couple hours, all the while making time-and-a-half!  Ain’t I a stinker?

A gay dance troupe performed on the stage when I arrived, and I spotted Rainmakers drummer Pat Tomek setting up his kit backstage.  In the crowd, I also spotted former KY-102 (and current 101-The Fox) DJ Skid Roadie roaming around the grounds.  The show was emceed by local gay legend Ron Megee, who is best-known as a female impersonator in numerous plays and such.  I couldn’t help but notice the similarity in his voice and that of Big Gay Al on TV’s “South Park”!  Eventually Bob Walkenhorst of the Rainmakers joined Megee on stage to help auction off some valuables for the charity, including an original copy of the pre-Rainmakers album Balls by Steve, Bob & Rich, along with some guitars and such.

The rest of the band joined Walkenhorst on stage eventually and they got down to business and played about an hour and 15 minutes.  They sounded pretty good, despite some equipment problems.  “Small Circles” returned to the set list, and the addition of “Width Of A Line” from Flirtin’ with The Universe was a nice touch.  The band was later joined on stage by members of another local favorite, Fool’s Face, and they played a spirited version of CCR’s “Proud Mary” to wrap things up.  While not nearly as good a show as the prior two, you just can’t beat free, so I got my money’s worth.  Hell, I was getting paid to watch this one, so who am I to bitch?!?


SET LIST:  Good Sons And Daughters/Let My People Go-Go/Different Rub/Wages Of Sin/ Small Circles/Width Of A Line/30 Days/Information/Skin/Long Gone Long/Nobody Knows/Downstream  ENCORE:  Proud Mary


85) Stevie Nicks/Boz Scaggs (Saturday, July 11, 1998—Sandstone Amphitheater) Ticket price: $21.50

My friend Tom is a huge Stevie Nicks fan, and since he had a birthday coming up in a couple weeks, I decided to treat him to a ticket to this show, even though I was more of a casual fan of hers at the time.  Over the years, her music has grown on me, and this turned out to be a fairly decent concert, too.


Tom and I arrived early enough to snag a pretty good spot in the lawn right down the center about a third of the way up.  Unfortunately, just prior to Boz Scaggs hitting the stage, this drunk, loud-mouthed bozo and his girlfriend decided to plunk down just to my right, despite it being a fairly small space between us.  This goomer was loud and rude most of the night, and he wondered aloud who this “Bob” Scaggs guy was.  A few minutes after that, a gaggle of dweeby Gen X-ers overtook a small plot of land just in front of us.  Most of them were drunk off their asses before the show even started, and none of them were even alive when “Lido Shuffle” or Rumours came out, which made me wonder what the bajeezus they were doing there in the first place.  The crowd (much larger than I anticipated) was a rowdier bunch than what I was expecting, filled with drunk rednecks more befitting of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, sprinkled with lots of Stevie Nicks wanna-bes.

Bob—er, Boz Scaggs finally hit the stage and played a marginally interesting set of mostly jazz-tinged stuff, saving “Lido” and “Lowdown” for the end.  He reminded me a bit of John Hiatt, only without the edge or sense of humor.


A brief set change ensued while I guzzled my third over-priced beer, and Stevie Nicks made her entrance.  She looked pretty good for a woman of 50-something, and her band wasn’t too shabby, either.  It didn’t take her long to get to the good stuff with “Dreams” second on the set list, followed by “Enchanted”.  The sound mix sucked, as it always does at Sandstone, and Stevie’s vocals were barely audible at times.  She couldn’t hit those high notes anymore, but still managed to sing well when we were able to hear her.  Highlights of the show were definitely the Fleetwood tunes, as well as “Stand Back” and “Edge of Seventeen”, which closed the show. For an encore, she did Tom Petty’s “I Need To Know” (a favorite TP song of mine), and her version of it almost sounded better than his.  Speaking of Petty, I was surprised Stevie didn’t do “Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around”, as well as “Leather And Lace” and “Gypsy”, but it was a decent hour-and-45-minute set—she neither blew me away or disappointed me, and Tom seemed pleased, so all was well.

I feel uptight on a Tuesday night...

Well, not really--just felt like paraphrasing a cool Kiss lyric for no particular reason...

A DETERRENT TO ALCOHOLISM
Just have a single beer line at any event!  This pic was taken at the concert I attended with several friends on Saturday night, and I think there were more folks in the beer line than there were watching the show.  Actually, it was a mighty fine show featuring what's left of Head East and what's left of local favorites Shooting Star (one original member each) at a new venue in Kearney, MO, just a little ways north of K.C. The permanent concession stands were not completed in time for this show, so patrons had only one choice for alky-hol, a temporary beer stand that wasn't terribly efficient, as you can see.  In spite of that, I liked the new venue a lot—it's light years better than Sandstone Amphitheater, albeit about a quarter of the size, but with superior sound.  Official concert review forthcoming soon in a future edition of the "Concert Trek" series on this blog...

CRUSADE UPDATE
Well, so much for my attempt to shame the woman who parks in the handicapped spots at my workplace whom I detailed in my last blog entry.  In spite of the pointed note I placed on her windshield Friday, she still had the affrontery to park in the same place yesterday, but amazingly, she must have had some miracle cure overnight, because she parked in a regular space today with the rest of us able-bodied humans.  Must have been those faith-healers on BET...

START SPREADIN' THE NEWS...
...I'm praising the Yanks!  Kudos for one of the rare occasions from yours truly to the New York Yankees for their very novel and classy approach to the pregame ceremonies for tonight's All-Star Game in Da Bronx.  They rounded up as many living Hall of Fame baseball immortals as they could find and had them take their original positions on the field, then introduced the starting players from each league at the various positions and had them join the Hall of Famers.  Brilliant idea!  Hell, the pregame was more fun than the game itself so far.  Our good friend Yogi Berra got the biggest round of applause of all, as one might expect.  Nice going, New Yawk!

Overrated singer/songwriter Sheryl Crow did a fairly credible rendition of the National Anthem tonight.  You don't suppose ol' Horsey Face is any relation to John Elway, do ya?

NO JOSHING
Gotta give it up to Texas Rangers' centerfielder Josh Hamilton's breakout performance in last night's Home Run Derby at Yankee Stadium, when he smacked 28 dingers in one round.  He didn't win the whole shootin' match (Justin Morneau of the Twins did), but this guy is an interesting story, as he's gone from drug-addled knucklehead to potential A.L. MVP in just a couple of years.  I'll be interested to see if he can maintain his current sobriety with all the media attention being foisted upon him.  Hamilton's round was the only one I watched last night, as I couldn't take an entire evening's worth of Chris Berman orgasms on ESPN.  I used to really like this guy, but his act has gotten as stale as Vanilla Ice's.

TATTOO YOU?
During tonight's game broadcast, Fox's Joe Buck made mention of Hamilton's numerous tattoos that Ozzy Osbourne might be envious of—26 in all—which Josh admits he now regrets.  I've never understood the whole tattoo thing myself.  Why would you litter your own body with graffiti?  There's nothing I feel that strongly about that I would feel the need to have permanently etched on my person anyway.  What I find truly depressing is the vast number of women with tattoos now—it's a MAJOR turn-off to me.  I don't even care if the tattoo is something dainty and feminine—they just come across as too macho for my tastes.  Another rare occasion when I sound like a conservative...

AWWW, POOR BABY!
Seems there's little interest in Major League teams in the services of one Barry Bonds this season, to the point where no team even wants to sign the schlub for the minimum league salary.  Just breaks your heart, doesn't it?

BUH-BYE!
CBS Sports finally came to their senses and got rid of insipid NCAA basketball color analyst Billy Packer this week, a move that comes about 20 years too late for my liking.  This guy (along with Dick Vitale) was such an irritating shill for the ACC and East Coast teams in general.  Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out, Bill...

AND NOW, THE END IS NEAR...
...for another classic sports arena, as it was announced today that the Spectrum in Philadelphia will be demolished sometime in 2009.  Opened in 1967, the former home of the 76ers and Flyers was replaced about ten years ago by the Insert-Corporate-Bank-Name-Here Center right next door, but has still been used by the Flyers' American Hockey League affiliate (aPhilliate?), the Philadephia Phantoms, as well as erstwhile indoor soccer team the Philadelphia Kixx.  The Spectrum was home to the famed "Broad Street Bullies" Flyers teams of the mid-'70s that won two Stanley Cups, as well as Dr. J and the Sixers and was the fictional site of the big fight in the first Rocky film (portrayed admirably by the L.A. Sports Arena).

CLASSIC MISHEARD LYRIC #89
"Empty Glass"—PETE TOWNSHEND (1980)  "I'm so sick of dub TV..."  Unbeknownst to me, "dub TV" is what Brits commonly refer to as videotapes, therefore I thought Pete was singing "I'm so sick of dumb TV..."

KIDS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS!
During a stop to get beer tonight at the local Kwikee Mart, I was wearing my Beatles Revolver t-shirt featuring that famed album cover on it.  The 20-something geek behind the counter complimented me on my shirt and said (in all seriousness), "Revolver—that's the name of the band, right?"  Oh, you youngin's...

OLD PEOPLE SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS!
Yet another bon mot from a patient at my workplace.  In filling out his medical history sheet, a man recently indicated that he had an "Asian Orange"...

Good morning, America--how are you?

I was listening to Arlo Guthrie's "City of New Orleans" the other day, and I thought that'd be an approriate blog entry title for this rare early-day entry...

THE JOYS OF HOME OWNERSHIP
As per usual when it comes to home improvement projects at my humble abode, I ran into a snag while attempting to redo my bathroom.  After removing the sheet rock along the exterior wall, I was pleased the find there was indeed insulation behind it, unlike my bedroom that I just finished doing.  However, after removing the insulation, I was quite displeased by the slap-dash job done by whoever it was that remodeled my house way back when long before I owned the place.  Those two horizontal gaps you see between the wood in this pic expose the aluminum siding on the outside of the house, subsequently allowing rainwater to get into the wood, causing that black shit you see, which is mold—it's a wonder I haven't gotten sick on this crap!  Some of that exposed wood is nothing more than a sponge now, too.  The good news here is it's a relatively inexpensive fix, similar to what my friend Phil and I did to the back door area of my house last year, albeit rather time-consuming.

A BIG PET PEEVE OF MINE...
...is people who abuse handicapped parking spaces, and I'm now on a bit of a crusade at my workplace.  There's this insipid woman who works for another company in our little office complex who thinks nothing of parking her car all day long in one of our handicapped spots.  While it's true the woman has an official handicapped tag hanging from her mirror, there ain't a damn thing wrong with her, unless having a fat ass is now considered a handicap (in which case, ALL parking spaces might as well have wheelchairs painted in them).  This woman certainly has no problem negotiating the two flights of stairs to enter her building, so yesterday I took it upon myself to type up this little note and affix it to her windshield:

"Wow, for someone who's handicapped, you sure get around pretty good!  Just so you'll know, at 10:15 this morning, ALL of the handicapped spots in both parking lots here were full, so the next person who came along who truly needed one was pretty much screwed, huh?...Hope you can live with yourself—just because you have a handicapped tag doesn't mean you have to use it!"

What's all the more appalling is this be-yatch works in the medical field, so she should know better!  While I'm on the subject, another pet peeve of mine are these lazy-ass people who press the handicapped-assist button to open the doors in office buildings, like they're just too weak to open the door on their own power...

YOU FELL FOR THAT (LITERALLY)?
Some yokel in Knoxville, TN claims he was so consumed by the spirit of God that he fell and hit his head while worshiping, so in typical red-blooded American conservative Christian style, the guy is suing the Lakewind Church for, oh, about 2.5 million semolians for his medical bills and "suffering".  Lawyers for the church claim that his fellow worshipers saw the man on the floor laughing after he fell.  In a way, I kinda hope the fucker wins—hell, I'd gladly go fall on my ass in a church for that kind of money in a heartbeat!  Praise the Lord and pass the loot...

SPEAKING OF RELIGIOUS PHONIES...
Not that I needed any further proof of what a cheese-dick he is, there was our favorite race-baiter, the Rev. Jesse Jackson this week saying that he wanted to "cut his nuts off", in reference to Barack Obama and the way he supposedly "talks down to black people."  Funny, but I thought "men of the cloth" weren't supposed to talk like that...

DUMB QUESTION, BUT...
...what the hell was the film School of Rock doing on Cartoon Network the other night?  Don't get me wrong, it's a funny flick, but what's it got to do with cartoons?!?  I find it rather pathetic how the cable networks can't seem to remain true to themselves by airing stuff that's out of their milieu.  TV Land is now obsessed with reality crap like "She's Got The Look" and "High School Reunion", The Learning Channel doesn't have a damn thing to do with learning ("World's Wildest Police Chases"?!?), BET airs a bunch of greedy white TV evangelists all the time, History Channel airs that ponderous "Ice Road Truckers" crap, ESPN is almost nothing but poker now and I don't think MTV has shown a music video since "The Macarena" came out.  Can we get back to the days when cable channels lived up to their names?

SPEAKING OF CARTOONS...
I made this little observation while watching "Family Guy" the other day—why is it humanoid cartoon characters always have three fingers and a thumb instead of four fingers and a thumb?  Why the digit deficit in animated humans?

STEVE MINGORI, 1944-2008
I read in the paper yesterday that former Royals pitcher Steve Mingori passed away on Thursday at age 64.  I remember how his was one of the first baseball cards I ever got out of a pack when I was about seven.  He pitched for Cleveland at the time, but he was a K.C. native, starring at Rockhurst High, and was traded to his hometown team just in time to be a part of the Royals' glory years in the '70s.  Rest in piece, Mingo...

CLASSIC MISHEARD LYRIC #88
"Tomorrow And Tonight"—KISS (1977)  "Take it in the cellar, let me see your fella--I'm gonna teach ya somethin' new..."  This never was one of my favorite Kiss songs, but I always thought the line went "Let me be your fella."  Let me see your fella?!?  Fella?!?  What the hell kind of Rock lyric is that?  Then again, Paul Stanley has often been accused of pitching for both teams...

YUMPIN' YIMINY!
Former tennis player-turned-nun Andrea Jaeger recently admitted to "throwing" a championship match at Wimbeldon to Martina Navratilova back in the '80s.  Seems that Sister Jaeger felt that she may have disrupted Martina's preparation for the match the night before, and couldn't have lived with herself if she'd won, so she aided and abetted Navratilova's win.  Rather honorable of her, I suppose, and hearing her name reminded me of something I read in a magazine when Jaeger was popular when someone asked what her training regimen entailed.  According to the magazine, "Andrea yogs and yumps rope a lot..."

What would Brian Boitano do?

Damned if I know, but Brian Holland's gonna blog some more...

ABBA DABBA-DON'T!
Supergroup ABBA was on hand last week at the Swedish premiere of the film version of the colossally-successful musical Mamma Mia! starring Meryl Streep.  Much to my surprise, the ever-reclusive Agnetha Faltskog—who for many years "vunted to be alone"—was a part of the festivities, which predictably fueled rumors of a potential ABBA reunion tour.  Björn Ulvæus and Benny Andersson were quick to quash those rumors, with Björn saying, "Money is not a factor, and we would like people to remember us as we were. Young, exuberant, full of energy and ambition."  I applaud Brother Björn's stance here—if there was to be an ABBA reunion, it should've happened about 10-15 years ago, and now I think it would border on embarrassing.  And they surely don't need the money—all four of them practically own half of Scandinavia anyway.  And they're the only group I know of with its own museum (slated to open next year).  There isn't even a Beatles museum, is there?  Thankfully, ABBA has decided to take The Beatles' advice and just "Let It Be".

For those of you keeping score, that's Benny in the red jacket at the far left in the pic.  Agnetha is in the white top above the first "A" in "Mamma", between Meryl Streep on her right and Anni-Frid (Frida) Lyngstad on her left, and that's Björn in the white jacket second from the right.

IT MIGHT BE...IT COULD BE...IT IS!! A GOAL?!?
It appears the NHL is going to stage this season's outdoor hockey game at venerable Wrigley Field between the Chicago Blackhawks and Detroit Red Wings.  I'm a tad surprised at this, since they could easily pack in another 30,000 tuque wearers at the much larger Soldier Field II, but since the game is scheduled for New Year's Day, I guess it would be a logistical problem if the Bears make the playoffs.  I still say they'd have no problem scheduling one of these special games here at Arrowhead Stadium—it's not like the Chiefs ever need the place in January...

CAN YOU SAY "HYPOCHONDRIAC"?
Every so often, we get these over-officious patients at my workplace who go to the trouble of typing out a dossier of their various ailments and complaints.  I thought I'd share a little example (exactly as the woman typed it):

—SYMPTONS
—HAVING TROUBLE WALKING STRAIGHT
—SHUFFLE FEET
—GANT IS NOT THE SAME (Former Atlanta Brave Ron Gant?!?)
—CAN'T WALK WITH ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF OTHER (Alcoholism?)
—POUNDING IN MY HEAD-NO PAIN OR HEADACHES
—THOUGHTS KEEP RUSHING THROUGH MY MIND AND WON'T STOP
—HAD CATARAC SURGERY ON BOTH EYES, LAST FALL
—TROUBLE CONCENTRATION AND REMEMBERING
—MY WRITING IS GETTING WORSE (No shit!)

And then she used the mighty F-word:
—I HAVE FIBROMYLGIA...

If there's ever a word that's guaranteed to cause rolling eyes in our office it's Fibromyalgia!  The scary part about all this is this woman actually drove herself to and from her appointment with us!

"WE ALL KNOW THAT CRAP IS KING..."—PART 1
Heaven's to Betsy—A-Rod is divorcing his wife!  And he's been romantically-linked to Madonna!  A-Rod stands to lose millions of dollars—cry me a fuckin' river, will ya?  Oh, and Christie Brinkley's divorcing the dickhead she married after dumping Billy Joel!  Whatever will we do?!?  And of course, "Entertainment Tonight" will be sure to keep us informed of every up-to-the-minute detail—they said so right on their show last night.  I feel sooo reassured now...

"WE ALL KNOW THAT CRAP IS KING..."—PART 2
ESPN's obsession with Brett Favre apparently knows no bounds, as they continually keep pushing all these Favre-coming-out-of-retirement-again rumors, in spite of the fact that the man himself has consistently denied them.  I find it sad that ESPN feels the need to manufacture sports news instead of merely reporting it...

PARTS IS PARTS!
The signboard at our local Colonel Sanders chicken emporium this week was hyping something about a "10-PIECE MALE".  Uhhh, I think I have more pieces than that—some longer than others!

YET ANOTHER SELLOUT...
Was very disappointed to hear Blue Öyster Cult's "Godzilla" on a TV commercial tonight.  Couldn't they have at least found a better product to use such a cool song on than CarTrader.com?!?

YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS!
The local yokel small-time daytime-only AM station that carries ESPN's "Mike & Mike In The Morning" fills in their unused advertising time by running numerous public service announcements, including an extremely implausible one featuring Paris Hilton (yes, THE Paris Hilton) encouraging all her fellow females to "Rock The Vote" simply because "Chicks rock!"  I bet the little skank isn't even a registered voter...

EMBRACING FAMILY VALUES
As is my habit, I have recently "discovered" a funny TV series that has been on for damn near a decade, FOX's "Family Guy".  Okay, I may be a little slow, but I've found that my strategy of avoiding a show for about ten years or more tends to pay off in the long-run.  For instance, I never watched a full episode of "Frasier" until after it went off the air in 2004, even though I liked the Frasier Crane character on "Cheers".  When "Frasier" debuted in the mid-'90s, I was already into "Friends" and a few other shows and didn't want to get attached to any more sitcoms at the time, so I "saved it for a rainy day", so to speak, since there isn't squat to watch on TV in our current decade.  Subsequently, I watched all the "Frasier" reruns on DVD and fell in love with the show (as well as Daphne and Roz) and now it's one of my all-time favorites.

As for "Family Guy" itself, I'd seen it a time or two over the years and liked it, but for some reason, I resisted its charms until just recently when it kept popping up on TBS and Cartoon Network, et al.  The episode that finally hooked me was the one where Peter and Lois attend a Kiss concert (in full make-up) and meet up later with the band at a Denny's.  My man Stewie is a total crack-up, and I love the way they skewer old TV shows like "Eight Is Enough", "One Day At A Time" and "Joanie Loves Chachi" on here.  It's like "The Simpsons" on steroids, and me and the dog have two things in common:  the same cool first name and a penchant for drinking...

Is it any wonder?

Just for shits and hoots, here's a little salute to a few one-hit wonder/lost classic favorites of mine from throughout the years...

"Get It On"—Chase (1971)  One of the funniest albums reviews of all-time came from Rolling Stone regarding the band Chase.  It read simply, "Flee!"  Funny as it was, I totally disagree with it, because this was a cool song in my book!  And it didn't take long for this one to catch on with college marching bands in the early '70s, as I often heard "Get It On" being played during football game halftimes—back in the day when they actually showed the halftime shows on TV.  Even though it wasn't on our playlist at KKJO in St. Joseph, I used to sneak "Get It On" in now and then during my graveyard shift gig on the radio, and those horns surely woke up a few St. Joseph-ians.  If I'd cranked my studio speakers up all the way, I might've shattered every window in the station, too!  Sadly, trumpeter Bill Chase and his entire touring band were killed en route to a concert at the Jackson County Fair in Minnesota in 1974 when their plane crashed just short of the runway.  Here's a video (if you want to call it that) of the song to give you a little taste of it. You can also find it on Rhino's Have A Nice Day-Super Hits of The '70s, Volume 5.

"Sausolito Summernight"—DIESEL (1981)  Diesel was a band out of the Netherlands, and this one got a lot of airplay on old KY-102 during the autumn of my senior year in high school.  It's sort of a sequel to Lobo's "Me And You And A Dog Named Boo" (ten years later) all about trekking around in a piece-of-shit car.  Here's a video that has nothing to do with the song, other than the driving in a car part.

"Hallelujah"—SWEATHOG (1971)  Back to that magical year 1971 for this one, and a bnad which had nothing to do with Horshack and Barbarino.  I really like this song, in spite of its pseudo-religious overtones.  It was your basic early '70s garage-band Rock, and had a nice attitude anyway.  I couldn't find a video for this one so you're on your own unless you can snag it on Have A Nice Day-Super Hits of The '70s, Volume 7.

"Also Spratch Zarathustra"—DEODATO (1973)  Is this not the coolest version of the 2001-A Space Odyssey theme, or what?  It begins and ends very morbidly, sounding as if recorded in a graveyard, then sounding a bit like the "Barney Miller" theme in places, this little jazz-fusion thang grooves throughout.  I loved how Deodato managed to make his guitar sound like yowling cats, too.  Here's yet another video that has nothing to do with the song in question, and you can find this one on Have A Nice Day-Super Hits of The '70s, Volume 10.

"Last Song"—EDWARD BEAR (1972)  Not to be confused with the Elton John song of the same name, this mopey little ditty was high on the charts in late '72/early '73 when I was in third grade.  Edward Bear wasn't a man, but rather the name of a group from Canada, and they never sniffed the Top 40 again after this one.  Here's a video that's kinda-sorta about the song.  Also available on Have A Nice Day-Super Hits of The '70s, Volume 10.

"Timothy"—THE BUOYS (1971)  Oh boy—the ramifications of this one!  Not since Cannibal & The Headhunters in 1965 had cannibalism been involved in a Top 40 record.  Written by Rupert Holmes (of "Pina Colada Song" and "Him" fame), I was blissfully unaware that the title character was eaten by the other two guys when I listened to this song at age 7 on WHB here in K.C.  I merely thought that Tim got lost and was never found.  Could this be where the band Fine Young Cannibals derived their name?  Available on Have A Nice Day-Super Hits of The '70s, Volume 6, "Timothy" is dissected furthermore in this little video presentation.

"Hocus Pocus"—FOCUS (1973)  The summer of '73 produced two really cool Hard Rock instrumentals, Edgar Winter's "Frankenstein" and this one from Holland's Focus.  If you can get past the Benny Hill-esque yodeling from their manic organ player, these guys sounded very Deep Purple-ish at times.  Here's a little taste of the song played live (although played way too fast).

"Painted Ladies"—IAN THOMAS (1973)  You'd be hard-pressed to find a better dead ringer for Neil Young than this dude.  Turns out that Ian Thomas is the brother of SCTV's Dave Thomas ("Good day, eh?").  Released at the tail-end of '73, this was a minor hit (#34 in Billboard), but a pretty cool song, all the same.  Available on Have A Nice Day-Super Hits of The '70s, Volume 17, here's a rather un-scintillating video of the actual record spinning 'round and 'round...

Changes in latitudes, changes in longitudes

CALIFORNY IS THE PLACE I OUGHTTA BE…
After months and months of plotting and planning for my big trip to New York City in August, I’ve decided to re-route my trip just a skosh, and now I’ll be heading to the Golden State, California, instead.  As badly as I want to see Yankee Stadium and Shea Stadium before they are reduced to rubble, it dawned on me last week that it would probably be a tad foolhardy on my part to try and take on Gotham City alone without a co-pilot and/or a police escort.  As I got closer to August, visions of Midnight Cowboy danced in my head (great movie, btw), and I realized that visiting New York would be much more enjoyable (and infinitely safer) in the company of others, especially someone who knows their way around up there, so I’ve decided to shelve that trip indefinitely rather than chance being literally splattered all over Manhattan.  I prefer to be in control of how I get around during a trip (i.e., rental car), and unfortunately, one is at the mercy of the subways and the buses to get around in the New Yawk, and I’m just not ready to deal with all that hassle, even though it’s actually cheaper than renting a car.

I’ve never been to California, and it’s been a longtime dream of mine anyway, plus I think I’m getting more bang for my buck than I would’ve in New York anyhow.  This is basically an extended version of the Bay Area trip I had planned to take last September that fell through, and it will now also include L.A., San Diego and most points in between.  And I won’t even have to go to L.A. via Omaha like Charlie Daniels—I managed to swing non-stop flights to and from LAX for under $300 round-trip via Southwest Airlines.  The baseball schedule shakes out nicely to include games at all five California Major League ballparks—Petco Park, Dodger Stadium, AT&T Park in Frisco, Oakland Mausoleum and Anaheim Stadium.  I’m also going to endeavor to check out some of the interesting eateries profiled on Food Network’s "Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives".  As it turns out I’ll even be driving early Sunday morning, through Bakersfield, so I’ll be sure to do like Mick Jagger and be "listenin’ to gospel music on that colored radio station."  Maybe I’ll find that girl with the "Far Away Eyes" too.  The journey begins August 14th and ends on the 22nd and I’m really pumped to find my place in the sun, so to speak…

A little tip for those of you planning vacations that involve flying:  Avoid renting cars at the airport if you possibly can.  Take a cab to a nearby local rental car office and you’ll save a shitload of money.  I have a week and one day lined up for this trip, and if I’d rented from Enterprise at the airport, it would’ve cost me $531.  But I did a little checking, and Enterprise has an office three miles from LAX in Culver City that’ll give me the same deal for $193—well worth the $15-20 cab ride!  Hell, I’d even walk the three miles toting my bags to save 300 some-odd bucks…

YOU DON’T SAY!—PART 1
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell stated this week what has been obvious for ages—rookie salaries are "ridiculous", and is now lobbying for some sort of cap on first-year player salaries.  True, all NFL players are overpaid, but I’ve been screaming about this for years—I’ve never understood how someone who’s never played a down in the league can rate these eleventy-millon dollar contracts right out of college when some 10-year veterans barely make the league minimum.  Don’t you have to start at the bottom of the pay scale and earn your way up?  That’s how it works at my job…

YOU DON’T SAY!—PART 2
I heard on the radio yesterday about a survey that was taken about which industry has the lowest rate of customer satisfaction and poorest customer service reputation, and cable television was ranked at rock bottom.  Imagine that!  An industry that offers an inferior product at over-inflated prices?  Nawww, couldn’t be…

Hell, I’ve had to have Compost—er uh—Comcast come out to my house twice in the last four months because the same half-a-dozen channels on my digital tier either pixellate or don’t come in at all, and naturally they’re the stations I watch the most (Fox Sports Channel, TNT, both ESPN’s, etc.), and it’s still not working properly.  I woke up about 5:00 in the morning yesterday and couldn’t sleep, so I turned on the tube trying to find something to watch, and seven or eight of my channels were completely dark, and another half-dozen were stuck in freeze-frame!  I’m paying $75 a month for this?!?  Monkey muffins!

DOES IT EVER STOP?
Naturally, one of the few channels that was still viewable yesterday morning when I couldn’t sleep was the venerable BET, and there was the late Rev. Jerry Falwell still begging viewers for money for God with the MasterCard and Visa logos superimposed on the screen.  Is it just me, or does it seem to be a tad tacky to have a deceased person asking live persons to send money to them?  I believe it was Bono of U2 who said, "The god I worship isn’t short of cash, Mister!"

LET’S PLAY THE BLAME GAME
Speaking of fat cats who don’t need money, I heard on the radio this morning that some executive from Chevron appeared on "Larry King Live" last night and basically blamed American consumers for gas prices being so high.  Well, excuse me for needing to get to work and back every day—what an ass I am!

By the way, I think it’s high-time CNN renamed "Larry King Live" "Celebrity Pity Party".  Every other night there’s somebody who’s fallen from grace pleading their case to Larry and the public, like Ed McMahon or the Osmonds or Dr. Phil or Tammy Faye.  Oh wait, that last one’s dead—I forgot!

I’M SOOOO RELIEVED…
…to hear that Angelina Jolie is "doing fine" in the hospital, thanks to our daily news media updates on her pregnancy.  My gosh, I just couldn’t carry on if something happened to her!  Seriously, why does this semi-attractive and overrated actress rate such over-the-top media coverage over every little thing she does?  That goes for her equally-overrated boyfriend Brad Pitt, too.  Come on, America—get a life, already!

JUST WAIT UNTIL CAPTAIN TENNEAL HEARS ABOUT THIS!
Have y’all seen this new ABC show "Wipeout"?  It’s an out-and-out ripoff of Spike TV’s "MXC", and it ain’t nearly as funny.  Can’t these TV executive schmucks come up with ANYTHING original anymore?!?  I bet Guy LaDouche could!  It's like the networks are totally out of fresh ideas for TV series.  I can just hear hear it now:  "Next week on a very special 'Celebrity Body Cavity Search'..."

A LONG, SAD GOODBYE
I guess it was inevitable, but workers have begun demolishing Tiger Stadium in Detroit this week.  The place has been closed since 1999, and there have been numerous efforts to preserve the park (or at least a portion of it) or convert it for some other use, including one led by former Tigers play-by-play announcer Ernie Harwell that is still on-going.  I’m all for saving old stadiums, but I think it’s better if they tear TS down at this point, rather than just letting it sit and rot like it has—it’s like watching a sick old relative dying a slow painful death.  I visited Tiger Stadium on a frigid Michigan May evening in 1991 for a Tigers game and was impressed with what immaculate condition the place was in for its age at the time.  If the powers-that-be had acted sooner, they might’ve been able to renovate the place instead of building the new Comerica Park a mile up the road.  I attended a game at Comerica in 2006, and while it’s a nice ballpark with all the bells and whistles, it’s about as soulless as a Zamfir record.  I’ll take the old parks with all the quirks and ambience and soul (and even the foul smells!) over most of these slick new places.  Time marches on, I guess…